The Little Professor

Help, I'm melting

One of the earliest improvements I made to House the Original was adding a simple through-wall A/C to the upstairs bedroom, which had originally been an attic.  Thanks to its attic-ness, temperatures in the summer were frequently ten to fifteen degrees warmer up there, and the little A/C (still going strong!) saved me from spontaneously combusting like Krook.  House the Sequel, despite being an improvement in many ways on House the Original, has been entirely lacking in A/C.  I didn't want to drill a large hole through my wall, as that's really not aesthetically pleasing, and the various options for houses with no pre-existing heating ducts (e.g., mini-splits) have one significant problem--they cost $$$.  $$$ which I have already spent on fixing whatever else has been wrong with House the Sequel, like the incorrectly-installed bathtub.  (Given the choice of having the bathtub crash through the floor into the kitchen or having pleasant temperatures upstairs, I opted for intact floors.) 

Nevertheless, I finally broke down and grabbed myself a window A/C:

...which, as you can see, is still in a box, as opposed to doing its thing in a window.  I don't know if you've looked at the title of this blog lately, but it's called "The Little Professor" for a reason.  Just getting the A/C out of the car and into the house involved high drama, because the A/C weighs nearly as much as I do; I hope the neighbors weren't overly concerned by my yells of self-encouragement, which they might have mistaken for howls of agony.  (Come to think of it, since the box wound up on my foot at one point, there probably were some howls of agony in there.)  Needless to say, getting it up the stairs was a non-starter, let alone getting it into the window, but I have high hopes that a handyman will arrive on Wednesday to take care of the problem (well, that, and replacing the kaput gate to my deck, and fixing a window, and...). Of course, getting it out of the window come winter will be...interesting.

In case you're wondering, it's currently 87 degrees upstairs. 

 

Woe is me, etc.

Granted, the CoHE didn't commission the study, but if the decidedly disgruntled comments are any indication, this article on glum associate professors fits the bill for one of its favorite topics: Aggravations of the Academic 1%.  "I have security of employment, so now I'm unhappy" ranks right up there with "I've been offered too many tenure-track jobs" and "I'm teaching at a R1" as subjects worthy of the world's most miniscule violins.  Or, for a change of pace, ukeleles.  (I'm surprised that the College Misery folks haven't made any snarky comments about snowflakes--or blizzards, even.) 

But...OK.  The article does accurately pinpoint how unstructured post-tenure life is: there's no timeframe for moving from associate to full professor, which can leave academics feeling as though they've been left hanging in the proverbial wind.  More to the point, graduate students and tenure-track faculty underestimate how much service work can suddenly rush into gaps once conveniently open for scholarship.  (When I received tenure, one of the very first things my chair said to me was "Congratulations! And now I have some committees I need you to be on.")  Many universities protect t-t faculty from excessive service obligations, which means that the slack rope suddenly goes tight when the magic "T" word happens.  Moreover, university-level service is often required for promotion to full professor, and such service has a habit of being more onerous than the departmental variety.  So, yes, this can be a real issue when it comes to scheduling, not to mention stress levels.

There's also the fear factor.  Will I ever get another promotion, or will I be trapped in-between forever? Can I advance in my career and have anything resembling a family life? (Many female academics of my acquaintance wound up delaying children until after they had tenure...which then means balancing the children with the additional demands of being tenured.) Or, more materialistically (and pragmatically), am I ever going to get another significant salary bump? And, as the article points out, it's very difficult to leave an academic position once you've been tenured and promoted; there are junior faculty positions, and there are a scattering of senior positions, but very rarely anything between.  I idly scan the MLA listings every year out of curiosity, and the number of positions for which I qualify (not for which I want to apply, but for which I qualify) generally ranges from zero to one.  For faculty marooned in deeply embattled or otherwise dysfunctional departments/universities, the sense of entrapment is real. 

 

 

Reginald Hill's final novel--not to be published?

I received an e-mail this morning from Amazon.co.uk, which said that Reginald Hill's final Dalziel and Pascoe novel (still untitled) was "no longer available." There's no official word from Hill's publisher, Harper Collins, about the book's fate.  It would be hardly shocking if there wasn't enough manuscript to bring out--the book's release had already been delayed twice--but I'm sorry if we're not going to have one final adventure.   

This Week's Acquisitions

• The Banished Family and the Bohemian Confessor (RTS, c. 1890).  Two very short historical tales about Protestants being persecuted by Catholics.  (eBay)
• Jane Rogers, The Testament of Jessie Lamb (HarperPerennial, 2011).  A young woman tries to make sense of life after terrorists release a virus that targets pregnant women.  (LiftBridge)
• Diane Long Hoeveler, Gothic Riffs: Secularizing the Uncanny in the European Imaginary, 1780-1829 (Ohio, 2010).  Explicating the Gothic supernatural in an increasingly disenchanted world.  (Amazon [secondhand])
• Timothy Maxwell Gouldstone, The Rise and Decline of Anglican Idealism in the Nineteenth Century (Palgrave Macmillan, 2005).  The (malign?) influence of T. H. Green on Victorian Anglican theology.  (A fictional version of Green plays an important role in Mrs. Humphry Ward's Robert Elsmere.)  (Amazon [secondhand])
• Michael C. Legaspi, The Death of Scripture and the Rise of Biblical Studies (OUP, 2010).  What happened to Bible studies in the post-Reformation era when the Bible was no longer entirely understood as "Scripture"? (Amazon)

Brief note: Hide Me Among the Graves

I'm not going to do a full write-up of Tim Powers' Hide Me Among the Graves, which belongs to the somewhat underpopulated category of Pre-Raphaelite Vampire Fiction.  Suffice it to say that it's a sequel to The Stress of Her Regard, which I think I may have read in the early 90s, and unless you have the earlier book to hand, chunks of the storyline verge on the incomprehensible.  (There's a lot of Our Vampires are Different.)   So it's not fair for me to post anything more than mildly review-ish (although I will say that there was a little too much Frances Burney in the plot construction: if one character had just de-scrupled at the beginning, there would have been no need for the rest of the novel).  

But, that being said, there were a couple of things that intrigued me.  First, how Powers takes the "supernatural" nature of artistic inspiration and translates it into Gothic terms.  The highest poetic achievements in this novel all occur under Powers' version of vampiric possession (or "protection"); to be purefied is also to be diminished.  Thus, the shape of Swinburne's career turns out to derive, in part, from the loss of his "patron."  When Swinburne asks what will happen if he manages to free himself, he is informed that will lose the ability to write like other tainted poets, such as "Byron and Shelley and Keats," but might be able to live  up to "Tennyson and Ashbless [an imaginary poet]" (190-91).  Implicitly, the shape of English literary history, at least when it comes to poetry, turns out to be the record of monstrosity: post-Romantic English poetry decays from its heights as it is purefied of its deadliest supernatural elements, reduced to merely human levels of greatness.  (Poor Tennyson.)  We can have the wildest flights of poetic imagination...or we can save our bodies and souls, one or the other.  Sacrifices for art turn out to have cosmic implications. 

Second, and along the same lines, a vampire novel in which the characters are battling against something that was at one point John Polidori is practically Harold Bloom in action.  One of the problems faced by the Rossettis and others is that vampiric "attention" makes it impossible for them to love other people or have children; one's artistic lineage comes at the expense of the biological version.   But Polidori's presence in a vampire novel very different from his own suggests that there are alternatives to being forever subordinated to an all-powerful "parent," literally and aesthetically.  Powers squares his characters off against the father of the British vampire novel, offering up an entirely different vampire mythos in the process: the child-novel reworks, and thus vanquishes (but also perpetrates) the force of its artistic "paternity."  The novel triumphs in the act of revising a mythos, rather than abandoning itself to suggestions from its precursors. 

 

The Syllabus of the (Very Far) Future

[I was thinking about the syllabi for a couple of new preps that I'm teaching next year, when all of a sudden, my mind was taken over by an energy being...from the future! And this is what I wrote instead...]

INTRODUCTION TO THE TRANSGLOBAL NOVEL I: FROM DANIEL DEFOE TO T’PETH

INSTRUCTOR: Dr. Lil Prawf

OFFICE HOURS: In-person hours MWF 1:00-2:00; online hours M 3:30-5:30; telepathic hours W 3:30-5:30.   No telepathic contact outside of those hours, please.

ROOM: 109B Sarek Hall. 

FEED: You can access the intergalactic feed for this course at channel X333921.  If you have technical difficulties, please ping IT, not the instructor.

COURSE DESCRIPTION: There is a fierce debate in literary studies about whether or not long prose works from non-Terran cultures can be analyzed according to the same criteria as the Terran “novel.”  (What can scholars of the genre do, for example, with the Cardassian novel, with its refusal of suspense and its outright embrace of what---to Terrans—seems to be boring repetition?)  This semester will introduce students to novelistic genres from a variety of galactic cultures, reading them through the lens of what the Vulcan literary theorist Simalak calls zh’layan, or “transglobal interdiscursive nodes of narrative contact.”  Readings from Terran, Vulcan, Klingon, Andorian, and Cardassian texts.  One holodeck simulation, two papers, exams, interpretive dance quizzes.  Fulfills the Early Transglobal Literatures to 2000 requirement.  Prerequisite: Introduction to Literary and Three-Dimensional Media Analysis. 

REQUIRED TEXTS:

• Simalak, The Theory of Transglobal Literatures: New Postgalactic Approaches, trans. Y. Ru Reedingthis (Luna UP, 2371)
• B’Spaq, The Errors, trans. Alexander Rozhenko (Harvard U at Qo’NoS  P, 2385)
• Ch’rae Aran Zh’faiane, How Blue Were My Hills, Standard ed. (U of Chicago P—Global Literatures Division, 2362)
• Daniel Defoe, Robinson Crusoe, 238^th ed. (Oxford Milky Way Classics, 2380)
• Marek, The Saga of Burnt Gul, trans. Chris Cross (New Horizons in Cardassian Literature, 2382)
• T’Peth, Look Skyward Lematya, Standard ed. (The Library of Vulcan Classics, 2371)

IMPORTANT NOTE:

It has come to my attention that students have been using codex editions of the texts instead of the standard digital editions.  In addition to being impractical and bulky, codices are more likely to contain errors that cannot be corrected within the university’s mandatory timeframe (at least one day after notification).  Moreover, codices are considered an Optional Expense under the university’s Credit Allowance Code (see Handbook of Student Policies, section 993.Z), and therefore use credits that you could otherwise put toward spring break trips to Risa.  In general, it is much easier for all concerned if you come to class with your digital editions loaded on your PADDs.

ASSIGNMENTS:

• Two papers: 50 points each
• Holodeck simulation: 25 points
• Midterm exam (take-home): 100 points
• Final exam: 150 points
• Interpretive dance quizzes: up to 50 points
• Message board participation: 10 points
• In-class participation: 10 points

NOTE: There is no extra credit available for this course under any circumstances.   Late work is not permitted; please contact the Department of Temporal Investigations if you need to use a rift in the space-time continuum and/or the Guardian of Forever in order to submit work on time.   Interpretive dance quizzes must be performed on the day assigned, but may be transmitted via holographic feed, if necessary.   

IMPORTANT NOTE IN RE: HOLODECK SIMULATIONS: Please make sure that your holodeck simulations do not result in property damage, holograms running amok, and/or the deaths of fellow students.  You will be docked at least fifty points in the event of any serious injuries.  For examples of what to avoid, I suggest that you consult the recently-declassified Enterprise NCC-1701-D archives, especially those under the heading of “Moriarty.”

CONTACT POLICY: I answer all e-mails within twenty-four standard hours on weekdays, and forty-eight standard hours on weekends.  Off-planet students should check their galactic calendars and plan accordingly.  Do not send me repeated e-mails asking why I have not responded; do not send me e-mails demanding responses before the twenty-four hour mark; do not send me e-mails asking if I have received your e-mails. 

Telepathic and empathic students should not contact me via psi methods outside of stated office hours.  Please recollect that Terrans do not normally communicate in this manner, and do not appreciate receiving random bursts of rage about grades whilst in the middle of baking cookies, driving holocars, or sleeping.

PAPER SUBMISSIONS:  All papers must be written in Standard and uploaded to the appropriate dropbox at the stipulated time.  It is your responsibility to see that your paper is correctly formatted in Milky Way Galaxy Language Association style (93^rd ed.); if you don’t know the current guidelines, please use one of the citation generators available on the library homepage.  Remember, late work is not allowed.  “The sehlat ate my PADD” is not an excuse, nor is “I lost all of my books in a transporter malfunction.”

POLICIES ON ACADEMIC INTEGRITY: As per the Handbook of Student Policies (section 19,301), the following constitute a breach of the university’s regulations on academic integrity:

• Plagiarism (including self-plagiarism)
• Copying another student’s examination
• Using psi methods to obtain answers for examinations
• Using telepathic projections in order to distract an examination proctor
• Using pheromones to manipulate or distract instructors, administrators, or fellow students
• Engaging in any other form of mind control that interferes with academic integrity
• Teleporting into an instructor’s office to steal examinations
• Engineering transporter breakdowns in order to interfere with an examination session
• Programming holographic doubles and other AIs to produce coursework
• Using replicators to generate “original” creative works

Any violation of university policy will result in an automatic “F” in the course. 

ELECTRONIC DEVICES: Students are required to bring PADDs to class.  Communicators should be set to vibrate or turned off entirely; any beeping communicators will be confiscated immediately.  Holovideo recording requires instructor’s permission.  Unauthorized postings of any holovideos to the InterGalacTicTubes will result in a lawsuit, so don’t even think about it.

WEAPONRY: Due to several unfortunate incidents, Klingons and Romulans are politely requested to leave all knives, swords, axes, and similar gear at home.  Active Starfleet personnel are permitted to bring one regulation phaser with them, but it must be turned off at all times.  Using a phaser on an instructor or fellow student is grounds for immediate expulsion (see Handbook of Student Policies, section 1A.)

POLICY ON EXCUSED ABSENCES: Attendance is mandatory for students registered for onsite instruction.  However, students are allowed an unlimited number of excused absences.   Acceptable excuses include personal or family illness, religious holidays, transporter malfunctions, Borg attacks, unexpected aging and/or regression to childhood, temporary mind and/or body swaps, pon farr, encounters with members of the Q Continuum, being trapped on the other side of a wormhole and/or in an alternate universe, and injuries related to holodeck malfunction. 

 

 

 

This Week's Acquisitions

• Sarah Wilkinson, The Subterraneous Passage and Albert of Werdendorff; The Black Forest (Zittaw, 2004).  Three reprints of early nineteenth-century Gothic chapbooks, originally published between 1802-1812.  Wilkinson was a heavy-hitting novelist for the Minerva Press. (eBay)
• Nancy Henry, The Life of George Eliot: A Critical Biography (Blackwell, 2012).  Short literary biography of Eliot; investigates the evidence, or lack thereof, for a number of myths about Eliot's personal life (e.g., why Lewes didn't divorce his wife Agnes).  I'm reviewing this for Choice.  (Review copy)