ASSISTANT PROFESSOR, LITERATURES OF THE KLINGON EMPIRE
KOLOTH MEMORIAL UNIVERSITY--BAT'LETH BRANCH CAMPUS, QO'NOS
The Department of Klingonaase invites applications for an assistant professor in literature of the Klingon Empire, 0 CE-present. Applicants of any species must be fluent in all Klingon dialects; competency in at least one other relevant language (Romulan, Andorian, etc.) strongly preferred. Instruction at the university is conducted in tlhInghan Hol; universal translators are not provided. The applicant's responsibilities include a 5-5 teaching load; a strong research program in comparative imperial literatures; and service to the university, including regular battle drills and collaborative armor repair. Candidates may be asked to demonstrate their physical fitness during the interview procedure, as the tenure process normally requires extended torture with Painstiks. Salary is competitive--that is, candidates must compete for their salary, most frequently by unarmed combat with one of the Deans. Non-Klingon applicants should familiarize themselves with the local culture before applying, as attrition rates are often high, thanks to mortal injuries incurred as part of the everyday academic routine.
The Ba'atleth campus is nestled in an especially inviting village, close to several picturesque volcanoes and two major deserts. Although the village is physically isolated and civilians are not permitted to use the transporter, the region is noted for its culture, especially Klingon opera and touring productions of Shakespeare in the original Klingon. Local attractions include fire pits, combat arenas, and a variety of cosmopolitan dining options, including one restaurant noted for Klingon-Tellarite fusion cuisine.
Applicants should submit a cover letter, CV, three letters of recommendation, affidavit of battle preparedness (preferrably an advanced certificate of accomplishment in either phasers or swordfighting), writing sample, and philosophy of teaching to Dr. B'UckUp, Chair, by April 1.
VISITING ASSISTANT PROFESSOR, LITERATURES OF THE OUTER RIM
CENTRAL UNIVERSITY OF TATOOINE
The Department of Literature, Philosophy, Astrophysics, History, and Metalworking invites applications for a three-year visiting position in Literatures of the Outer Rim. The Central University of Tatooine is a post-New Republic institution, with a mandate to prepare promising scholars for careers in interstellar business, exoeconomics, and cyborg management. Our secondary concentration in Literatures of the Outer Rim is an optional track for majors in Extra-Market Commodity Circulation, an interdisciplinary program overseen by Literature, Economics, and Starship Navigation. Applicants should be fluent in at least three languages, although this requirement may be waived for those who can prove ownership of a protocol droid. Teaching responsibilities will include at least two sections of New Republic Literatures and Traditions per semester, as well as one section of Introductory Programming. We prefer applicants with at least some Jedi training (Intermediate Light Saber certification) who can defend the campus in case of Sith invasion. Although Central Tatooine does not offer tenure, employees do receive generous benefits, including all-you-can drink nights at the local cantina and full health insurance (loss of arms and hands not covered).
Despite its reputation, Tatooine is currently undergoing a cultural renaissance. The planet recently became home to the Gamorrean Royal Ballet, which won intergalactic plaudits for its new production of Pigs in Space, and the Astromech Color Guard and Rolling Band. The Central University was recently ranked 211,000th in Corellian News' list of intergalactic institutions, an improvement of nearly 5,000 places over a five-year period.
Applicants should submit an information chip, midichlorian count, and all transcripts to Dr. Reedic Ulouslang Uage, Chair. Interviewees should wear comfortable clothing appropriate for sudden sandstorms. Please note that air conditioning is rarely available on Tatooine.
ASSOCIATE OR FULL PROFESSOR, WESTEROSI CULTURAL STUDIES
CITY COLLEGE OF KING'S LANDING
The Department of Cultural Studies at the City College of King's Landing is pleased to announce a senior position in Westerosi Cultural Studies. (Please note that this position is open only to candidates who are not revived from the dead and/or wargs.) After the mysterious deaths of the previous twelve occupants of this line, we are eager to make a permanent appointment. Candidates should be well-versed in Westerosi popular entertainment, meteorology, blood magic, and contemporary politics (please see "mysterious deaths," above). We are particularly interested in scholars with a subfield in Boltonian aesthetics, for which there is additional travel funding; for some reason, our previous appointee disappeared near Dreadfort while conducting field research, so we would advise caution. Although the position requires no teaching, it does require the holder to maintain a rigorous program of scholarship, obtain outside grants, and represent the college at major events (e.g., weddings). Those who fail to perform their duties adequately will be sent to the Wall.
King's Landing, in addition to being one of the great cultural and economic centers of Westeros, also features unique local furniture and intriguing, if mysterious, cuisine. The climate is pleasant, although we expect a slight cooling trend in the immediate future. The political scene is especially entertaining, and subject to change at a moment's notice.
There is no pre-screening for this position. Please come directly to the college for an interview; bread and salt will be supplied on request.